There are several memes that go around the internet that joke about Paul’s letters. There’s the one that reads, “General Pauline Letter Outline: Grace. I thank God for you. Hold fast to the gospel, For the love of everything holy, stop being stupid. Timothy says hi.”
Another one is the a video where it’s the Blue’s Clues song, where they sing, “… we just got a letter, wonder who it’s from,” to which the video changes and it’s a screaming marmot with the word Paul over its head.
This is the idea of what Paul is about. Always yelling, or trying to fix situations because people are stupid. When in reality, Paul’s desire is for Christians to follow Christ ever closer. And this is why Paul writes to Philemon. So if you have your Bibles, we’re going to go back to Philemon and pick it up in verse 8 of the letter.
As we jump back into Philemon verse 8, for our second week, let’s talk about last week.
In our first week in the letter to Philemon, we talked about how Paul sent out two letters to the Colossian Church. The first was the general letter to the church, that included theology about Christ, and practical application. We also talked about how Paul mentioned Onesimus, who was a slave of Philemon, who had runway. Following this, a second letter, the letter that was specifically addressed to Philemon was most likely read right after the first, because it too addressed the general church.
Paul did this to challenge Philemon in a public matter on issues that were brought up in the general letter to the church.
This is why Paul begins the letter by recognizing all the work God had done through Philemon. Philemon had given the church a place to meet, and he had been a refreshment to the believers. This showed us how we should approach people. Instead of seeing all the bad they have done, we need to view them first and foremost and Christ sees people: as image bears of God. If they are unbelievers, that image is marred by sin and they are lost, we need to love them as Christ does, and his loved led him to die for sinners while they are still in their sin. For believers, we are saved but still falter in sin, so we need to remember that we are all growing in our relationship with Christ, and we need to extend grace to others.
That’s what we see Paul doing with Philemon. Even though Philemon had been growing in his love of God and love of people, there’s something that is hindering his faith being shared from being truly effective. Paul’s desire here is that this area of Philemon’s life will be transformed, and this is why he writes.
So let’s read together Philemon verses 8 through 21.
8 Accordingly, though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do what is required, 9 yet for love's sake I prefer to appeal to you—I, Paul, an old man and now a prisoner also for Christ Jesus— 10 I appeal to you for my child, Onesimus, whose father I became in my imprisonment. 11 (Formerly he was useless to you, but now he is indeed useful to you and to me.) 12 I am sending him back to you, sending my very heart. 13 I would have been glad to keep him with me, in order that he might serve me on your behalf during my imprisonment for the gospel, 14 but I preferred to do nothing without your consent in order that your goodness might not be by compulsion but of your own accord. 15 For this perhaps is why he was parted from you for a while, that you might have him back forever, 16 no longer as a bondservant but more than a bondservant, as a beloved brother—especially to me, but how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord.
17 So if you consider me your partner, receive him as you would receive me. 18 If he has wronged you at all, or owes you anything, charge that to my account. 19 I, Paul, write this with my own hand: I will repay it—to say nothing of your owing me even your own self. 20 Yes, brother, I want some benefit from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in Christ.
21 Confident of your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I say.
Every believer has a realm of authority that Christ has placed them over. Most of us it’s first our own lives, followed by the people we interact with. In cases of Christian leadership, it’s the ministries that God has called us to be over. For me and the other elders, it’s this local congregation. So there is a sense of submission that has to happen within those who choose to be in the congregation.
But just because someone is given authority in an area, it doesn’t mean that they are allowed to be harsh with that authority. That’s one of the lessons we learned in both 2nd Corinthians and Titus. Here, Paul gives us a glimpse of how to apply the authority Christ has given us.
Paul says he could command Philemon to do what he is going to ask of him, because of the position Paul holds in Christ, subtlety pointing to his apostleship. Yet, to command someone to do something they are unwilling to do, is religion without grace, which leads to seeds of bitterness. So instead, Paul makes an appeal. That word means to encourage, invite, even beg. Paul is inviting and encouraging Philemon putting into practice, what has been said in places like Micah 6:8, Mark 12:29-31, and his own letter to the Colossians that was just read.
So what is it? What’s the problem? From what can be gathered, Onesimus was Philemon’s slave or a better word is bondservant, which will discuss next week. Onesimus ran away from Philemon to Rome, where a lot of slaves would flee to, because they could get lost in the metropolis. But while there, through God’s grace, Onesimus found Paul and accept Jesus as Savior.
Onesimus was apparently unproductive for Philemon, most likely because slaves would despise their master. Yet after coming to Christ, Onesimus became productive. So productive it seems, that Paul wanted to keep him because of how useful he was.
Yet because Paul wanted to do everything right, the first thing that had to happen was for Onesimus to restore his relationship with his master, Philemon. Who, just so happened, was a brother in Christ to Paul.
Paul then sends his two letters, with the intention of putting Philemon into the mindset that Onesimus isn’t just a slave, but a fellow brother in Christ. This harkens back to Paul’s words in Galatians 3:28, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” Paul is giving real world application for the idea that, though there are roles we live, in this case master and slave, we should recognize that when we accept Christ, those distinctions matter less, than the love we are to show towards each other.
Paul could have brow beaten Philemon and ordered him to be restored to Onesimus, he had the authority to do so, but instead, Paul seeks Philemon to willfully put into practice the words of Christ, “For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother. (Matthew 12:50)” Onesimus, though had runaway, had come to Christ and now the relationship needed to be mended, because restoration of relationships is Christ’s desire.
All of this has to be done in Christian love and cannot be forced.
It’s here in verse fifteen, that Paul sees God’s hand in working all of this out. Paul sees how Onesimus running away led him to being saved. This was done by God for two purposes. First, that a lost one would be found; which is the very reason Jesus came (Luke 19:10). Second, that Onesimus would then return to bring a greater work in Philemon that he might grow in his faith and become a greater witness for Christ. And through these two, the Church at Colossia, would have a greater impact in their community. This is the real world application of Romans 8:28, where Paul previously wrote, “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”
Paul loved God and was called according to his purpose. Philemon loved God and was called to his purposes. Now Onesimus loved God and was called according to his purpose. All three are now in a position where they have to trust that God will work things out for good. Paul is sending back Onesimus hoping that God will restore the relationship. Onesimus returns to his master hoping he would be restored.
To put it in perceptive, Onesimus was returning to an unknown consequence. He and Paul were hoping for a godly outcome, but it could have turned out that Philemon exercised his Roman right to beat, brand, amputate a limb, increase the work load, sold to gladiator games, or put Onesimus to death. This wasn’t just another awkward situation were you have to say, “I’m sorry.” The ramifications of an unrestored relationship here meant that Onesimus would be in a worse position than before.
It’s because of this that Paul brings the debt to himself. Paul’s final appeal, if not of the sake of Christ, is then for the sake of the one who brought Christ to Philemon. Though Philemon doesn’t owe Paul, if there is a debt Paul wants it to come from him and not Onesimus. Paul would take on the debt of Onesimus if it meant that was the only hurdle to overcome for Philemon to accept him as a brother in Christ. How much is one soul worth? How much cost is the restoration of a relationship worth? Paul is basically saying, he would put himself on the hook for Onesimus, because the temporary physical bondage is worth the spiritual freedom of restored relationship.
This is what God is calling us to. To desire restored relationships above even our own temporary hurts. Forgiveness, both to seek it and to give it are hard things to do. It’s hard to forgive someone who has done us wrong, because we are in our right to hold a grudge and to get what we deserve.
Yet Paul writes in Ephesians 4:31-32, “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”
Jesus speaks in Mark 11:25, “And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”
Extending forgiveness to people is hard, yet it is a sign of maturing faith in Christ. If our Lord forgave us while we were still in sin, then how, if we confess to follow him, do any less?
On the other side, it’s hard to seek forgiveness too. By doing so, we have to first recognize our wrong, and then humble ourselves in front of the person we harmed. We have to trust that whatever the situation, our love for God and his purposeful call to seek forgiveness, will be worked out by his grace. The fear of what could happen, should not stop us from doing what is godly. Is the consequence of our sin greater than what could have happened to Onesimus?
My challenge for you this week is that you divided a paper into two: Those who I need to forgive on one side, and those to whom I need to ask forgiveness from on the other side. You might only write on one side, that’s okay, seek the Lord in to working things out for good, because of your love for him, and your desire to walk in his purposes. If you don’t have either, then praise God, and pray for your brothers and sisters as they walk in seeking or extending forgiveness.
God is a forgiving God, who’s forgiveness knowns no bounds. So let us be his people who experience that forgiveness and extend it to the world around us. Amen.