As a child, did you ever do something that warranted your parents to correct you. Like steal a piece of candy from a store, just to have your parents haul you back inside to confess? The reason why parents do this is because, the old saying is true, “Honestly is the best policy.”
That was true of a civil engineer names Othmar Ammann. In the early 1900s, Othmar was a leading bridge designer on the east coast of the US. He oversaw the construction of eight bridges and several other transit corridors. He was sought after mainly because he was able to bring projects in under budget and before the deadline. This was especially important because some of his first projects were during the Depression Era.
But what is even more impressive about Othmar, is that he was able to own up to his own mistakes. Othmar designed, and began to build the Bronx-Whitestone Bridge in the late 1930s. In order to save costs, reduce the bridge’s weight, and to make the project look sleek, he removed the deep steel girders that he original designed for the bridge. Then, in 1940, the Tacoma Narrows bridge collapsed due to high wind vibrations. Othmar, who was a student of bridge collapses, realized that his own bridge, which had opened a year prior, had the same problem, and could collapse as well.
When Othmar realized the issue, he contacted the Triborough Bridge Authority and reported the danger. Over the next five years, steel cables, and trusses were added to strengthen the bridge. Later on, triangular shaped lightweight fiberglass aerodynamic fairings were added to mitigate the wind issue.
Othmar, owned up to a mistake, that could have cost him his reputation, and future projects. But because he owned this mistake, and thereby corrected it, he went on to build four more major bridge projects. He has been honored many times with awards, statues, and plaques.
It’s this idea of owning our mistakes that brings us back to our summer series, where we’ll be picking it back up in Second Samuel Chapter 18, verse 1. And as we open up to Second Samuel 18:1, let’s look back on how we got here.
David’s personal sin of lustful eyes, led to adultery, conspiracy, and murder. Out of it, divine judgment was passed. His child from the adultery died, then his first born son violated his sister, then another son killed that son, then the son who killed the other, conspired against his father and tried to take the throne for himself. From all of this we talked about how unconfessed and unrepented sin festers and brings about more destruction, and so we are to confess, repent and seek the cleansing work of the Holy Spirit as an antidote to festering sin.
We also saw that through this whole ordeal, David had grown in his faith. Which is one of the reasons, God called him a man after his own heart (1 Sam. 13:14; Acts13:22). Form David’s growth we understood that, God calls us to a faith that is always growing; a growing faith is one that is content in Jesus and seeks his purposes.
With that fresh in our minds, we can turn our attention to Second Samuel 18, where we’ll be reading through Chapter 19 verse 8. However, we won’t be reading everything, so, again, your homework is to read the rest of the passage. Let’s read together.
18:1 Then David mustered the men who were with him and set over them commanders of thousands and commanders of hundreds. 2 And David sent out the army, one third under the command of Joab, one third under the command of Abishai the son of Zeruiah, Joab's brother, and one third under the command of Ittai the Gittite. And the king said to the men, “I myself will also go out with you.” 3 But the men said, “You shall not go out. For if we flee, they will not care about us. If half of us die, they will not care about us. But you are worth ten thousand of us. Therefore it is better that you send us help from the city.” 4 The king said to them, “Whatever seems best to you I will do.” So the king stood at the side of the gate, while all the army marched out by hundreds and by thousands. 5 And the king ordered Joab and Abishai and Ittai, “Deal gently for my sake with the young man Absalom.” And all the people heard when the king gave orders to all the commanders about Absalom.
6 So the army went out into the field against Israel, and the battle was fought in the forest of Ephraim. 7 And the men of Israel were defeated there by the servants of David, and the loss there was great on that day, twenty thousand men. 8 The battle spread over the face of all the country, and the forest devoured more people that day than the sword.
9 And Absalom happened to meet the servants of David. Absalom was riding on his mule, and the mule went under the thick branches of a great oak, and his head caught fast in the oak, and he was suspended between heaven and earth, while the mule that was under him went on. 10 And a certain man saw it and told Joab, “Behold, I saw Absalom hanging in an oak.” 11 Joab said to the man who told him, “What, you saw him! Why then did you not strike him there to the ground? I would have been glad to give you ten pieces of silver and a belt.” 12 But the man said to Joab, “Even if I felt in my hand the weight of a thousand pieces of silver, I would not reach out my hand against the king's son, for in our hearing the king commanded you and Abishai and Ittai, ‘For my sake protect the young man Absalom.’ 13 On the other hand, if I had dealt treacherously against his life (and there is nothing hidden from the king), then you yourself would have stood aloof.” 14 Joab said, “I will not waste time like this with you.” And he took three javelins in his hand and thrust them into the heart of Absalom while he was still alive in the oak. 15 And ten young men, Joab's armor-bearers, surrounded Absalom and struck him and killed him.
16 Then Joab blew the trumpet, and the troops came back from pursuing Israel, for Joab restrained them. 17 And they took Absalom and threw him into a great pit in the forest and raised over him a very great heap of stones. And all Israel fled every one to his own home. 18 Now Absalom in his lifetime had taken and set up for himself the pillar that is in the King's Valley, for he said, “I have no son to keep my name in remembrance.” He called the pillar after his own name, and it is called Absalom's monument to this day.
18:1-18
The chapter begins with David organizing his men for battle outside the city of Mahanaim. He separates them into three groups, each under one of his generals. David knows the battle plan of his son, and so prepares for the attack. One of the important details here, is that he has decided to go out to fight with his men. Hopefully this is because he learned his lesson from the last time he stayed behind.
However, his men convinced him to stay behind, because he’s too valuable to be lost. If David is killed, then the fight is over and Absalom wins. So he stays behind. But notice where he stays. He doesn’t go up on a roof, where he had sinned before. No, this time he goes down to the gates, and waits for word of the battle. The gates are the first place you could hear news; so David foregoes the cushy waiting place, so that he could be as close to the battle as possible.
Yet he had one request of his army. In verse 5 he tells them, "Deal gently … with the young man Absalom.” What he’s requesting is that they not kill his son. This is heard by all the soldiers.
Then the battle ensues. David’s men overcome Absalom’s, and 20,000 people die in this fight for the throne. Then, as Absalom tries to escape, he gets caught in a tree. It is possible that one of the reasons we were told back in Chapter 14 about Absalom’s thick hair, was because it got caught in the tree here, and that has been the popular view. However, it doesn’t tell us that directly in the text if this is the case. However he was stuck, and unable to get out. He now posed no threat, because he couldn’t defend himself.
It’s here that a man of David sees this and reports back to Joab about Absalom’s situation. When Joab asks why the man hadn’t killed Absalom, the man tells him that David didn’t not want that. This enrages Joab, who takes javelins and strikes Absalom himself. Then Joab’s armor bears join in to finish the job.
The battle ends with Absalom’s men fleeing, and the would be king, being buried in the forest, instead of with the monument he made for himself.
Summarize - 18:19-33
Then comes verses 19-33. One man, Ahimaaz, wants to go tell David the good news, but Joab knows that there’s a possibility that whoever brings the news of Absalom’s death to the king, might die. This has happened twice: once when David was told about Saul (Ch 1) and the other when he was told about Ish-bosheth (Ch 4). In those cases the one’s who did the killing, also died. So Joab sends another man in Ahimaaz’s place. However, eventually Joab relents and allows the first man to go.
Even though the first man leaves second he reaches David first, but doesn’t disclose what happened to Absalom, instead he deflects the question when asked. This actually blunts the death of Absalom, because David was given the good news of the victory, before the bad news. Then the second man arrives and tells David that Absalom had been killed.
And this what we read in verse 33, “And the king was deeply moved and went up to the chamber over the gate and wept. And as he went, he said, ‘O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! Would I had died instead of you, O Absalom, my son, my son!’”
David mourns the death of his son. Even though Absalom was his enemy, this is not how he wanted things to end. Yet, this is just another reminder that the consequences of our sin can have effects that destroy the people around us.
While David is mourning his son, we read Joab’s response starting in Chapter 19, verse 1.
19:1 It was told Joab, “Behold, the king is weeping and mourning for Absalom.” 2 So the victory that day was turned into mourning for all the people, for the people heard that day, “The king is grieving for his son.” 3 And the people stole into the city that day as people steal in who are ashamed when they flee in battle. 4 The king covered his face, and the king cried with a loud voice, “O my son Absalom, O Absalom, my son, my son!” 5 Then Joab came into the house to the king and said, “You have today covered with shame the faces of all your servants, who have this day saved your life and the lives of your sons and your daughters and the lives of your wives and your concubines, 6 because you love those who hate you and hate those who love you. For you have made it clear today that commanders and servants are nothing to you, for today I know that if Absalom were alive and all of us were dead today, then you would be pleased. 7 Now therefore arise, go out and speak kindly to your servants, for I swear by the Lord, if you do not go, not a man will stay with you this night, and this will be worse for you than all the evil that has come upon you from your youth until now.” 8 Then the king arose and took his seat in the gate. And the people were all told, “Behold, the king is sitting in the gate.” And all the people came before the king.
19:1-8a
We see that Joab confronts David about mourning for Absalom. Telling David that its as if he cares more for his enemies than for the people around him. If that’s the case, then Joab will see to it that the people will leave him. Now, this may seem mean, but there is some truth to Joab’s confrontation.
There is two sides to this. David, as a father, should mourn for his son. This situation might have been avoided if David had been faithful to God. However, David is also the king. The people love him and have sacrificed to keep him in power. Absalom was an enemy, even if he was also a son. David cannot mourn like a father, when he also has to lead as a king. That is the burden of leadership. Sometimes our personal issues get pushed to the back, as we deal with issues that go beyond ourselves.
Here’s the reality, David should have never been in put in this situation to have to mourn his son’s death because of a civil war. David’s sin led to this moment, and he knows it. From his words in verse 33, “Would I had died instead of you …,” there is a hint that David wishes that he would have died in place of his sin. But the reality is, Absalom died because of his own sin. It is true that David was a catalyst, but Absalom had his own hand in it. He didn’t have to kill Amnon, he didn’t have to conspire against his father, he didn’t have to rebel against his king. In the end, David is not at fault for his child’s choices, even if he was a bad role model.
Each of us will stand before God and give an account of what we have done, not what has been modeled for us.
Paul writes in Romans 14:10-12, “Why do you pass judgment on your brother? Or you, why do you despise your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God; 11 for it is written, ‘As I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God.’ So then each of us will give an account of himself to God.”
In Second Corinthians 5:10, Paul writes, “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.”
There is a sense where we should mourn over our sin which has been a bad example to those around us. I have been a bad example many times, and I have to live with that understanding that I have failed many people. However, it cannot be an excuse for us to point to others and blame them for our sin. We will stand before God and give an account on what we have done, not what has been done to us. Others will given an account for their own lives.
Absalom will not stand before God and point to David and say, “David should have done better!” Because if he did, God will respond with, “No, you should have done better in spite of David.”
This is why God calls each of us to a personal faithful walk. God never calls us to walk the same walk as another, but a unique walk that’s all our own. We might have overlap, we might have influences, but at the end of our lives, it will not be by other people’s sin that we will be judged by, it will only be by what we have done.
So praise God, that anyone who puts their trust into Jesus, will not be condemned for their sin. It is the one and only instance, where God looks to another at our judgment. If we have placed our trust into Jesus as our Savior, we can accept that we have fallen short of his righteous standard, and yet stand tall in the righteousness bought by the blood of Jesus, that covers us.
My challenge for you this week is this: First are you holding grudges against people who have sinned against you? Are you using them as an excuse for what has happened to you, and so live in state where they still have sway in your life? I’m not downplaying the pain and suffering they have inflicted on you, and they will give an account to God because of it. But you are not them, Jesus wants to free you of that bondage. So take this week to seek forgiveness for that person, giving them over to God, and for you to walk more faithful.
Second, repent of the bad example you have been. Maybe you have hurt others, and showed them what it’s not like to follow Christ. Repent of that before the Lord, and if possible, reach out to that person and repent. That is a great example of humility and could be a catalyst for healing and forgiveness in their lives.
Each of us has fallen short of the standard of God, we are no greater than anyone. But God has called us into his greatness by keeping the standard for us. Let us therefore be a people who stand in his righteousness work and not our own unrighteousness. Amen.
